I Still Love You
A free short story, following characters within the Starting Out Series
© Jane Lark
Not to be replicated without the permission of Jane Lark
Jason was in a knot of girls with Billy. He smiled, looking beyond the girls, at me. I poked my tongue out at him. His smile lifted higher, and then he held a hand out for his beer as I got closer.
“Billy! We need some dance music!” Lindy yelled. “I vote line-dancing! Is anyone up for line-dancing?!”
I looked at Jason when most of the people in the room cheered. He hated line dancing. He rolled his eyes at me as I planted the beer bottle in his palm. He pulled it out of my hand as the girls around him turned to start helping decide which song they were going to dance to. I moved closer to him, and the arm holding his beer came around my neck, he leaned over and said into my ear. “You were ages, you okay?”
I nodded biting my lip refusing the lump of tears at the back of my throat, then I sipped my orange juice and felt the vodka burn my throat a little. It slipped into my bloodstream in moments. I really was not meant to drink with my meds.
With his arm still about my neck, Jason squashed me as he pulled the bottle to his lips, he took a long swig from it. I pulled away, as Billy put on some country slash pop music album for them to dance to.
Jason took another swig from his bottle then looked me in the eyes. “Are we dancing?”
“If you want…”
“If I want? Is this the girl who used to drag me literally shouting onto dance floors…”
“Yes we’re dancing.”
“Put your drink down then and come up close to me. I just don’t fancy orange juice all over my best suit.”
“You have makeup all over your suit now anyway.”
He smiled. “Am I allowed to take the wig off, this thing is itchy.”
“Yeah, I’ll let you.”
He pulled it off, and tossed it into the corner of the room.
“Take yours off too.” He didn’t wait for me to answer, just pulled it off and tossed that away too. “That’s better you look a little more like you now.”
“But your makeup looks silly without the wig.”
“Who cares, we made the first impression, I’d rather just feel comfortable and have fun now.”
I stepped closer to him as his hand settled on my back, in the hollow of the lower curve, that the dress hugged. He still had his bottle of beer in his hand, and that bumped against my shoulder as his other arm wrapped around me and his mouth pressed against mine, and my arms slipped about his middle.
His tongue slipped into my mouth and danced around mine, and we swayed to the song, pressing up against each other. We hadn’t done this for a long time. Maybe not even since Saint was born, and that was a long time ago.
He broke the kiss and then he leaned around me to take a long swig from his beer, wrapping his arm around my neck again. Then he whispered in my ear. “I love you.”
I wanted to cry again. “I love you too,” I said as the song ended then I turned around and picked up my orange juice and drank it all down, the vodka hit my bloodstream as the next song started.
“I’m gonna go and get another beer…”
The others in the room were joining in with the line dancing, it looked a little crazy with every one dressed up in lots of weird costumes. But I wasn’t into that any more than Jason was, and he had a major passion against it. “I’ll come with you.”
When he got into the kitchen he smiled over at me as he got a beer out of the fridge, and then he held it out. “Do your thing…”
I took it out of his hand and popped the top of on the counter edge by smacking it with my palm. He took it back from me smiling. “Do you want to go outside, for a while?”
“To spend some time alone. We never get to spend any time alone…”
He took another swig from his beer.
He held the door for me as I walked out, I was going to settle into one of Lindy’s and Billy’s garden chairs, but Jason caught hold of my arm. “No, sit with me. We can fit in one chair.”
He sat down, and then pulled on my wrist. “Come on.”
With my free hand I lifted the skirt of my borrowed wedding dress and sat on his lap, with my knees bent up, facing him.
“That’s better.” He smiled. Swigging some of his beer.
My fingers ran over his short hair, then down behind his ear, and down his neck. “Your so good looking, even covered in a Zombie disguise, I can see what those girls see in you.”
His fingers tucked one side of my hair behind my ear. “And you are still the best looking girl I have ever seen… so I am not interested in what those girls see…”
“But they aren’t mad… I am”
“You were always mad, Rach, it’s part of why I fell for you.”
I sighed, drank my second glass of orange juice and vodka, then leaned down to put the glass on the floor, then I snuggled my arms around his neck and leaned against his shoulder, getting more makeup over that suit jacket he didn’t want to spoil.
“I miss you,” I said. It was a stupid thing to say, he was with me every day.
“I miss you too.” The emotion in his words rumbled in his chest.
His head tipped back as he drank his beer down, that was always a bad idea for Jason, if he kept drinking like that he’d have a major hangover in the morning.
He leaned sideways and set his beer down, then his hand gripped either side of my head and moved my face so I looked at him. “Kiss me again…”
I smiled, and then did.
His hands gripped my ass, as his tongue danced about mine, and he encouraged me to slide at little closer.
I broke the kiss. “We haven’ just kissed, like this, for ages have we?”
“I do know, Rach.” His hand cupped the back of my head and he brought my lips back to his. It spun me into the past, onto the dance floor when we had first got together, we had done a lot of kissing when we had first got together, but I’d already been pregnant with Saint, and so we hadn’t had much of a honeymoon period. All this was my fault.
He broke the kiss. “Stop thinking about whatever you’re thinking about and just kiss me.”
I smiled again and then I did, my fingers gripping over his hair and my tongue controlling the kiss. Yes, that was how I had used to kiss him. That was how we had kissed in the club the night we’d first hooked up. The grip of longing firmed in my belly, a little knot of want. It had used to be a huge knot of want, but that was the weight of my meds dragging me down and holding me back.
His hands slid to my thighs beneath the dress. His hands were warm, even though it was cold out here. His fingers slid up to the seam of my panties, and then he just gripped as he kept kissing me, but now his hips were moving a little against me, to the beat of the music that seeped through the glass of the living room window.
I let my high heel shoes slip of my feet and fall onto the decking and then I slid a little closer to him, my toes tucking in behind his knees as he had his legs spread, spreading my legs too. He was still rocking up against me, and he was making the little knot ravel up a bit bigger and tighter.
I broke the kiss, looking down at him, breathing hard. “Jason…” What was he trying to do?
“Go and get me another beer.”
I climbed off him, but didn’t put my shoes back on, and I went into the house, my feet getting cold on the decking as I tiptoed across it in my thin white stockings.
“You look amazing,” Jason said behind me. “Seriously your legs look awesome like that!”
He was getting drunk, he was so bad at handling his drink, but we were at a party, and we were young, he was here to get drunk, that was why he’d wanted to sleep over.
I ran into the kitchen, the music had been turned up, and I could hear them in the living room all shouting out the words and whooping as they did their thing. It wasn’t our thing.
I knocked the top off another bottle of beer for Jason, but then I got a second bottle and did the same, and I took two outside. Holding them both in one hand by the necks of the bottles, I offered him one by pointing the base at him. He carefully slipped it out of my grasp. “Are you drinking? You shouldn’t––”
“I am just going to have a couple of sips, then you can have the rest.”
“Okay…” He reared his palms up. “I’m just your husband who cares about you, not the drinking police.”
I laughed at him and smacked his shoulder, then I lifted my dress and straddled his thighs again.
“It’s just don’t drink too much, you know if you do it will make you sick.”
“I know.” I sighed. “I hate the effects of this medicine.”
He looked into my eyes and didn’t say anything.
Then he sighed. “I do too. I hate that you aren’t able to be you… I want you back.”
Click on this for a soundtrack… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DKRRg150OYU
There are more parts coming later!!!
and if you want to read the beginning of Jason’s and Rachel’s story it runs throughout The Starting Out Series
Book One I Found You
Book Two Just you
Book Three I Need You
and the story will continue in 2015 in I’m Keeping You